Bitterness and disappointment are emotions we’ve all faced at some point in our lives, often deepened by gaslighting—when we feel our experiences are dismissed or twisted. It’s in these moments we may feel utterly disoriented, unsure of who to trust or how to move forward. But as people of faith, we have a foundation that is unshakable in Jesus Christ, even when others try to destabilize our footing. Let us explore how we can bounce back from these setbacks with grace and hope, while staying true to our calling as Christ-followers to love others, even those who may not understand or share our vision for the future.

The Weight of Disappointment

Disappointment has a way of weighing down the soul. In Psalm 42:5, the psalmist cries, “Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become disturbed within me?” We’ve all been there—feeling disturbed, restless, and heartbroken when our expectations crumble. Gaslighting compounds this, as it makes us question what’s real, further deepening our sense of loss.

But the Lord reminds us that our hope is not in human validation but in Him.

No matter how bitter the disappointment, God is still at work, preparing a way forward for us. Though others may try to cloud our perception, God provides clarity through His Word. Spend more time in God’s Word.

When Views Collide

In today’s climate, it can be hard to engage in conversations where our views diverge from others’. Increasingly, people shy away from considering perspectives outside their own, and this has created a culture of division. The feeling of angst we feel is the realization this cannot stand. The Bible calls us to a higher standard. Romans 12:18 challenges us: “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.”

This doesn’t mean we compromise our convictions, but it does mean we approach others with humility and respect, recognizing that God’s wisdom is infinite, while our human understanding is limited. When someone’s path forward seems to clash with ours, we are still called to love them. Jesus reminds us in Matthew 5:44 to “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This includes those who may gaslight us or dismiss our views.

Sharing Happiness Amidst Disagreement

We have major holidays coming. One of the hardest things to do is to share our happiness and hope with those who don’t see things the way we do, especially when it feels like they’ve played a role in our pain. But here’s the truth: happiness and hope are infectious. When rooted in Christ, they can transcend differences. That’s the power happiness and hope give.

Philippians 4:5-7 tells us, “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” When we carry ourselves with gentleness and peace, others take notice. We can disagree with others without being disagreeable, modeling a Christ-like spirit of grace and reconciliation. By doing so, we leave the door open for healing and restoration of relationships, even when we can’t immediately see eye to eye. We can agree that we want to heal and restore. After all, if we are being completely honest, who is it that benefits most from our division?

Three Tips for Moving Forward

So how do we get our feet back under us when we’ve been knocked down by disappointment, gaslighting, or divisive conversations? Let’s consider three practical steps:

1. Recenter on Jesus: Take time in prayer and Scripture to recalibrate your heart and mind. The world may shift and opinions may vary, but Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). He is your constant when everything else feels shaky.
2. Release Resentment: Letting go of resentment is essential to healing. Romans 12:19 urges us not to take revenge, but to leave room for God’s justice. Harboring bitterness only prolongs our pain. Forgive, not because they deserve it, but because your soul needs the freedom.
3. Reconnect with Purpose: Sometimes disappointment comes because our path takes a detour. Ask Jesus to realign your heart with His purpose for you. What does He want you to learn from this season? How can you be a light, even to those who may not agree with you?

Conclusion

Disappointment and gaslighting can feel like the end of the road, but in Christ, they are simply obstacles to overcome. By centering ourselves on Jesus, releasing bitterness, and remaining open to His leading (a.k.a. being teachable), we can bounce back with grace. All of us. And in doing so, we can share our hope and joy with others, even when they walk a different path. Let us pray for the strength to live as Christ lived, loving others while standing firm in our faith, trusting that God will guide our steps forward.

A Prayer for Personal Grace and Hope

Loving and Faithful God,
We come before You with hearts that have known disappointment, with souls that have felt the sting of hurtful words, and with minds that have been clouded by confusion. In the midst of all this, we turn to You, our unshakable foundation, the One who never fails us even when others do.

Lord, we ask for Your grace to heal our hearts from bitterness and the wounds caused by gaslighting and misunderstandings. Help us to release any resentment that lingers within us, so that we might find true freedom in Your love. Remind us that in You, we find our worth, not in the opinions of others or in how we’ve been treated.

Give us the courage to walk in Your light, even when the path forward feels uncertain. Let us trust in Your leading, knowing that You have a purpose for us even in times of confusion and disappointment. Guide us with Your wisdom, so we may move forward with clarity and confidence, trusting that You are making our paths straight.

Lord, in a world where division seems to thrive, help us to be peacemakers. Soften our hearts so we may love others, even when they don’t share our views. Teach us to engage with gentleness, respect, and humility, reflecting the love of Christ in all we do. Let our hope in You shine brightly, even in the midst of disagreement, so that others may see Your goodness in our lives.

We ask for Your help, Lord, as we begin the work of healing, to bring as many with us as we are able. Recenter our hearts on You, release us from the burden of resentment, and reconnect us with the purpose You have placed on our lives. Strengthen us to live out Your call with grace, forgiveness, and a heart full of hope.

In the name of Jesus, our Redeemer and Guide, we pray.
Amen.